Real Men Sew
by flootzavut
Summary: 1.12 Danny can't seem to get over the fact that Steve can sew. Vaguely McKono, Ohana, McDanno friendship, team fic.


**a/n **So, you should know I'm several seasons behind, and also that I ship McKono even though it's not close to canon. Also I doubt Danny really thinks men shouldn't sew, but he's drunk. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. Team fic, McDanno BroTP, Ohana ftw.

All that said, I hope someone enjoys this...

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**_Real Men Sew_**

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Grace is safely in bed, and it's kinda nice to just sit round together, sipping beers and enjoying the peaceful moment. Or it would be peaceful, if Danny would stop talking.

"OK, OK, let's put it to a vote, who thinks it's weird that super SEAL here knows how to sew."

Chin Ho shrugs noncommittally. "Useful skill, I guess." He actually looks about as impressed as Danny was, but he has more skill at diplomacy. And seeing as the man spent most of the day with a bomb round his neck, Steve is feeling pretty charitable.

Kamekona is the one who brought the subject up again, and he's now just sitting there with a big smile on his face, like this is the most entertaining thing he has ever witnessed in his entire life. "My vote's with Chin."

The grin on his face does not give Steve any confidence Kamekona is actually on his side, but whatever.

Danny isn't giving up. "It's not an open vote, and Chin's wrong - no offence, buddy."

Chin just shrugs. For a guy who didn't think he was gonna live through the day, he's amazingly chilled out.

"Who said this team was a democracy, anyway?" mutters Steve.

"Pipe down babe, this doesn't concern you."

"You're voting on me but it doesn't concern me?"

"Shhh. If you're gonna make someone a nice housewife someday, you gotta learn when to keep quiet. Kono. Hey Kono! Need your opinion on something."

Kono waves an arm like she's batting away an annoying insect, which, well, Steve can understand that sentiment when it's Danny.

"Shut up, brah. Lemme sleep."

"It'll only take a second, Kono."

She lets out a noise that's halfway between moan and whine. Danny, predictably, ignores it. Steve, on the other hand, just _wishes_ he could ignore it.

"Don't you think it's weird that Mister Über Cop can sew?"

She opens one eye a little, looking at Danny like he's losing it. "What?"

"I mean, big hunky man with all the muscles and the looks and the piercing gaze-" (Steve rolls his eyes. He hasn't yet figured out if Danny is just jealous of his physique or if it's some kind of compliment that he can't help commenting on Steve's looks) "-and he's sitting there sewing up a Santa costume, don't you think that's a little bit, y'know, weird?"

She gives him a wtf look and lets her head roll back against the couch where she was before Danny started peppering her with questions.

"Danny, you are the one who's weird, brah."

"It's not strange, according to you?"

"Nah, man." Kono doesn't even bother opening her eyes again. "It's hot."

"Hot?! How can you say it's hot when a grown man is sewing? With a needle and thread?! He's not even using a machine, it's like he's doing needlepoint or something..."

Danny rants on a little while longer, but Steve has tuned him out, too busy trying to figure out what Kono meant. It's hot that he sews? He's hot? He's hot _because_ he sews?

He's hoping Chin is too drunk to wonder if the stupid grin on Steve's face is in any way related to his baby cousin's comment.

Kono thinks he's hot? OK, so maybe she's had a little too much to drink and is currently half asleep, but he'll take it.

He's had a little fascination with Kono Kalakaua ever since she emerged from the water like Venus and then felled a man with one punch like Muhammed Ali. And she thinks he's hot? Twenty years old, lethal and beautiful, and she thinks _he's_ hot? Damn.

Danny's still talking, though he has, thank God, moved on from his fixation with the word weird.

"Next thing you know you'll be telling me it's hot that he cooks, I mean the man _bakes_-"

"Yeah, tha's hot too," she agrees, slurring a little. "You cook a girl dinner, she's gonna be impressed."

"You realise what you're saying here? You're saying my brand of suave machismo is not enough, that I have to bake, what, snicker doodles too. Is that what you're saying to me Kono, cause I gotta tell you, I-"

They all speak in perfect unison, even Kamekona: "Shut up, Danny."

Danny pouts - there's really no other word for it - and it's kind of cute and funny as well as annoying. There are times when Steve can see exactly how Danny ended up with a hot ex wife: both the hot and the ex are pretty explicable, actually. Danny's a good guy, and he has a lot going for him, but Steve's been tempted to open the car door and boot his partner out into traffic when he runs his mouth off.

Kono lifts her head again and opens her eyes a crack. "So, you gonna bake us some cookies for a good job, boss?"

Steve grins at her. "You think it's possible to make cookies in Danny's kitchen? Does he even have a stove?"

She pouts, too, and sorry Danny, but it's definitely cuter on her.

Danny isn't ready to drop it. "Real men use their kitchens to reheat takeout."

"You gotta learn to feed yourself, man."

"I feed myself, I pick up the phone and make my order, they bring me the food, it's how things work, it's the way of the world."

"When I was a SEAL-"

"What is it with you? Always with the SEAL card."

Steve shrugs, and takes another slug of beer.

Chin's alive. Danny's ranting. Kono thinks he's hot.

It's a good day.


End file.
